Seems basic, but a lot are still confused as to the whos in the planning committee. Better make sure the members are right, or there will be high possibility of confusion and miscommunication on your wedding day.
The most necessary and basic of course, is
1. The Bride and Groom
It's nobody else's wedding but yours, so nobody should be more active than the couple. Even if you chose to rely most of the planning and even conceptualizing to your coordinator, you should still be informed and updated of the progress, and approvals should still be secured from you.
More so if you just hired OTD coordinators or none at all. All involved suppliers in the wedding day should be aligned, have a copy of the timeline with all the details, etc. The work would essentially be the same regardless if your wedding is grand or intimate, because it all boils down to proper coordination. Even the simplest weddings can go wrong if some of the tasks are improperly delegated.
Brides are often more active then the groom, but it does not mean we can just accept and completely leave them out. This is also their wedding and their day would be as special as yours. If they do not want to participate much in planning, at least get their essential preferences and conditions, as well as provide them timely updates and secure approvals on the important details to avoid unfavorable shocking surprises during the day.
With that, it goes without saying that the second important member of the planning committee is
2. The Coordinator
Leave it to every couple's best friend to make the show run, and keep it running! They will serve as the central hub that will pass information from Point A to Point B, Point C, and any other suppliers and teams involved. Just discuss your plans with them, and they will coordinate accordingly to all the teams involved. Guest list and RSVP management, conceptualization, program discussion with host, supplier recommendation, documents processing, entourage briefing and orientation, and other nitty gritty details are all pluses of having a coordinator in the team. All these are expected only if you hired a full coordination planner.
If you hired an OTD coordinator, mostly it's same process. You would still have to discuss and turn over everything to your coordinator. The only difference is you should have booked all necessary suppliers beforehand, have all documents processed, have a things packed and ready to go, have your guest list and table arrangements organized, etc. All prior work should have been done before turning over everything to your coordinator.
Same goes if you have surprise performances. You can surprise anybody, but not the coordinator!
Essentially, these 2 are more than enough to make up the planning committee. However, there are a few exceptions, especially if you have the following types of people:
3. Optional: Parents / Other Relatives or Elders
Nobody knows this better than ourselves, so we need to be honest from the start. If you know you have meddling parents or elders (or to put it nicely, really want to be involved in the planning), better include them in the loop as early as possible. Some might like it, some might not particularly to those who have conflicting plans. However, completely leaving them out knowing full well they have some intentions for your event spells more disaster.
Horrific stories on couples breaking apart and families torn due to disagreements on wedding plans are not unheard of, and believe it or not, are still common and happening. Even with disagreements on the most trivial details can leave a huge impact to the planning. I also heard a story on how a couple had already booked most suppliers with their own money, but upon narrating their plans to their parents, they were forced to move to a different venue with a few different suppliers changed, without being able to get their refunds. So the solution? Start with them in the loop with the coordinator and compromise along the way. At least this way, it can be win-win for both, and at the same time you save money and time instead of spending them on adjustments and changes.
That said, even if your parents or elders are not interested to be involved, do brief & orient them on some of the timeline and programs of the day so they can be aware of the timing and orders of the activities. Most elders are still unaware of post-ceremony activities such as cocktails and photo shoots, that may encourage them to open the buffet early due to concern with time and hungry guests. Some might spend time mingling with guests or going elsewhere without knowing they should already be lining up for the entrance march. This is the job of your coordinator on the day, but it would not hurt to inform them earlier to make it easier on the day. Remember, a little misinformation can greatly affect and alter the program flow of your reception.
4. Optional: Bridal Party
Like your parents or elders, orienting your bridesmaids and groomsmen on what they needed to prepare ahead, call times and what is expected of them during the day can help reduce risks for miscommunication and confusion. They do play a major role during your wedding. They will be by your side starting from preps up until the after party. Your coordinators will brief them for sure, but communication between you and your group of friends during the planning is also actually fun besides being more prepared, and they might even suggest good ideas for your special day.
This is more true if you did not hire any coordinators and if you expected them to fulfill some duties during the day. It's very critical and some may tend to forget that they have jobs to do if they are carried away with the activities and festivities of the wedding. For this setup, it is important to choose the right, reliable and dependable people in your bridal party to make sure what you tasked them to do can actually be done without issues.
Bridal parties may not be applicable now for 2020 or even on 2021 due to the pandemic. But I strongly believe this will not last long. Nobody knows what will happen, but I'm still including them in all sorts of wedding planning because I stand strong that ones the crisis is over, we will get back to how weddings are and must be: a once-in-a-lifetime, life-changing celebration of love and happiness surrounded, joined and witnessed together by people who we love and matter to us. For now though, we can follow the rules and opt them out if marriage can't wait, but we can always include them in our postponed grand celebrations in the future.
That said, it's not advisable to have too many people involve in the planning. The 4 above is ideally the maximum members. More than that, there will highly likely be clashing opinions and preferences that will not in any way help with moving the plan forward. Remember, despite wanting to please our guests, parents, elders and friends, ultimately the wedding day will still be all about the couple. The event should express the couples likes, personalities and styles. Should the worst happen where nobody agrees with anybody, the couple should ideally always be the final decision maker, and parents should be able to hopefully respect that.
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